Week 12 - match-ups

Quick update today as it is my Wedding anniversary and so I am at home celebrating. Additionally, it is Thanksgiving today/tomorrow so I have a turkey in the smoker smoking away, should be ready in about 7 hours time.

Thanksgiving Day brings us three NFL games tomorrow (Friday) so make sure your team is up-to-date to handle the early games.

Time is running out for Breesus, Lighties, Agent P and myself to make a run to the play-offs. One, maybe two more win to the Farns and BB should seal the deal.

Agent P is the only Coach who can claim a Spanner this week, the rest of the games are between peered teams.

Endless v Breesus

Two game losing streak for Breesus, a win is needed here to stay in contention to defend his two titles. Endless had a good win last week with her players finally finding some form.

Lighties v Zim

The Lighties are *just* in contention still I think, and need to stop their five-game slide. Zim blew up last week but can knock the Lighties out with a win here.

The General v BB

Huge game for both teams, The General to keep up with Marcy and claim a seventh straight win, BB to arrest his slide and stay in the top-four.

Marcy v Agent P

Both teams are on three game winning streaks which means the winner will activate the Gardner award. Marcy has been in this position twice already this year, the first being beaten after 3 and the second time she did become too big for her boots. Agent P's late-season revival mirrors many teams in the NFL, and like them she has a remote chance of making the play-offs. But only if she wins out. Big game.

Doof v Farnsworth's

If the Lighties are my Foe then the Farns are my Nemesis, too many wins at inconvenient times. This weeks presents the Farns with another chance to ruin a season. But the stakes are huge for the heartless-one with so many teams breathing down his neck, looking hungrily at those last two play-off spots.

Week 11 - Awards

The Spanner

The Spanner is awarded to teams in the bottom four of the Standings late in the season who defeat a Top Four team, thus, making it more difficult for them to make the Play-offs and end at the top. 


Only 1 Spanner Award to present this week, and it goes to Agent P for defeating the third place BB. Agent P is on a 3-game winning streak and the win against BB elevated her into 7th place, dropped BB and handed him his 3rd loss in a row. A big win, and a big spanner thrown in BB's game plans!

Hypnotoad Award

The Hypnotoad Award recognises outstanding achievement in scoring


The Week 11 Hypno is awarded to Agent P. She has won her fair share, in fact, more than her fair share, of MA's this year and this Week claims two of the three good awards - the Gardner being the third good one. A score of 106 generally won't get you a Hypno, but you take your chances and Agent P did that this week. 

Mission Accomplished

The Mission Accomplished Award recognises outstanding achievement in walking away early and not finishing it off


The Week 11 MA is awarded to the Lighties with 43 points on the bench in a losing team. As if losing by 0.08 points isnt bad enough, and it is pretty damn bad. And getting overtaken by Agent P. And dropping 5 in a row. What is going on in the Lighties camp? 

Week 11 - wash-up

Exciting week of games!

Both The General and Marcy had wins this week and stay neck and neck. BB's third loss in a row puts him further behind the two leaders and is now equal 3rd/4th thanks to the Farns inching past the Lighties.  Agent P's run puts her even with the Lighties, and overtakes him in the Standings!

Farnsworths (70.7) scraped past Lighties (70.62)

Wow! Another super-close game, only 0.08 points in it. Point-oh-eight. Insane. Both teams had a player with a 0, so that is nice and symmetrical. The Farns took some pity on the Lighties starting Phil Rivers by playing the Eagles D, who posted -1. That is brotherly love, from the City of Brotherly Love - Philadelphia.

The General (102) def Breesus (70)

The General stormed his way through another game, six on the trot now and still equal first place. Palmer had a tidy 24 points and is crazy hot, Hopkins came back from a down week with 23. The rest were nice contributors. For Breesus, Romo's back baby, with a Cowboys Win and a semi-respectable 13 points, and shared the love with Bryant with 10. The Chiefs D monstered up 20 points, and everyone else was too busy getting ready for Thanksgiving.

Marcy (79) def Zim (57)

Low scoring game, but Marcy did enough to take the W. Rogers had a reasonable game fantasy-wise, but an important RL game beating the Vikings and getting the Packers win. Three so-so contributors did enough to combat Zim's total lack of contributors. Benching Graham this week was worth it, not by much but Suck It Graham! Didn't see Lynch getting pulled, that 0 hurts. And the Patriots struggled to get anywhere in their Monday Night game - which just kills Zim.

Agent P (106) def BB (57) 

The highest score of the week is Agent P's 106, which shows just how hard Week 11 was. Not that Cam Newton knows anything about that, 31 points and Carolina's 10th Win of the season. Martin also had a day out, 235 rushing yards for 23 points. BB broke another QB, this time Joe Flacco who did his ACL on the last drive of the day - done for the season. That's three he's broken, if memory serves? Did we count Peyton in that list, too? It could be 4 QBs. Julio Jones tried hard for the Falcon's with 16 but they lost another and keep my prediction of tanking the rest of their season alive. Everyone else? Gone Fishin'?

Endless (96) def Doof (65) 

Endless had a very tidy day out, Wilson showed up with 25 for the first for ages, Lacey was ok with 10, Gurley had a poor day with 10, DJax got some love in Washington with 14 and Hill posted 16. See Endless, they could do it, they just chose not to the last 10 weeks. Like my players. Dalton came alive in the last half of the last quarter and somehow ended with 22. The rest were off hanging with BB's and Illuminators's players I think. Hmmm, I thought that the trade with Breesus totally sucked for me and he would have rocked it, but West only did 6 points after injuring himself in the 2nd quarter. I benched Jones (6) for Diggs(6) and Johnson (6). I think the trade was well-balanced this week. If West doesnt play next week then it could well have gone in my favour. Which is ace, but I hate to see any player get injured, so that sucks.

Week 11 - Match-ups

Here we are for the 11th week of football this year, with only three weeks of the regular season after this one. If my maths is correct, that's four weeks for Breesus, the Lighties, and me to make a run and try to bump off Farns or maybe BB. Total catastrophe would be required to knock-off US Forces or Marcy at this point, I suspect. Three Spanners are up for grabs this week, with the Lighties, Agent P and Zim all eligible to make it hard for the League leaders. Go get em!

Farnsworths (91) v Lighties (109)

First Spanner game: some big players out on the Bye for the Farns this week, and still a RB short.Add to that Ryan v Colts and AP v a hungry Packers and this is a danger game. Especially with the Lighties keen to make up for last weeks... ANNIHILATION. Carr over Rivers as it stands, will that last through the weekend or will Rivers get the nod at the last minute? McFadden needs to put up points to keep the Cowboys in with a chance, and the same is true for Jones and Green Bay. Seattle D v 49ers could be a big gainer, though.

Breesus (94) v The General (115)

Drew Brees is out this week as his team studies the dictionary to learn the meaning of the word Defence. It is possible Romo will be back for his first game following a broken collarbone, but could you trust him? I'm curious to see what Breesus will do. A pending Trade with me means that more changes to the team will follow over the weekend. And are no doubt required, given the roll that the General is on. Five in a row and projected for a sixth. He needs to win to keep up with Marcy and BB. Palmer, Langford, Hopkins are all good enough on any given day to keep him up there.

Zim (102) v Marcy (130)

Fresh from throwing spanners at BB, Zim has a good chance this week at keeping Marcy in check. She made a load of Free Agent acquisitions this week that have'nt been added to the team yet, so look for a different starting line-up Sunday night. Edelman is replaced by Amendola, in keeping with the strong Patriots theme, Floyd and Jones could become starters and Snead is back-up for next week. Marcy has some big outs this week with both Stewart and Brown rocking the bye. Which Rogers will show v the Vikings?

BB (118) v Agent P (99)

Like the Denver Broncos, BB's experiment with Peyton Manning is done. In steps Joe 'Cool' Flacco, against a Rams D that could go either way on the day - just like Flacco's Ravens. In good news, Julio Jones and Freeman are back from a refreshing bye week and facing a rather poor Colts. In bad news, my prediction is the Falcons will struggle the rest of the season. Prove me wrong! We are all looking for another 17+ from the Gronk this week (except maybe Agent P). Agent P is still carrying some Bye's, including the D that she'll need to hit the Free Agent market for. Newton v Washington is an interesting match-up, the good v the trying real hard.

Doof (102) v Endless (89)

Endless has brought in a new Kicker and needs to add him to the starting line-up - and he's a good one. Starting Jackson is a smooth move, his third game back from injury the time is right for some DJax action. Having to roll with Lacey must be like eating sand - such pre-season promise to such a total bust, but Gurley might do enough for both of the them. I'm looking for my Red Rifle to bounce back after a poor showing alst week and thankfully its against the league leading Arizona Defence. D'oh! Oh crap, they are also my D this week. Ugh, Paradox-city here I come. Looking at that trade to come through to finalise the active players.

Week 8-10 - Award Ceremony

I have intentionally let the Awards Ceremony slide for a few weeks, you Hypno winners know who you were each week. But we'll assemble for the Awards this week, backdate a few and announce the winner of the new Award. 

The Gardner is still active: The General now has a five-game winning streak and is getting very, very cocky - everything Han Solo warned against. next thing you know he'll be turning off his targeting computer, using the force to pick his team each week and having delusions of grandeur. 

*New Award*

The Spanner

The Spanner is awarded to teams in the bottom four of the Standings late in the season who defeat a Top Four team, thus, making it more difficult for them to make the Play-offs and end at the top. 

The inaugural Spanner Award this week goes to Zim, for defeating BB, formerly in a three-way tie for first place. Zim really threw a Spanner in the Works this week, BB fell a place while The General and Marcy both won and sit a game ahead.

Hypnotoad Award

The Hypnotoad Award recognises outstanding achievement in scoring

The Week 8 Hypno is awarded to Farnsworths, a comfortable 115 against Breesus.  


The Week 9 Hypno is awarded to Marcy for a whopping 145 points against the Lighties. 

The Week 10 Hypno is awarded to The General for his 119 point win over Endless. Five straight wins and the top of the Standings. General, sir, I think maybe the world needs you right now. I suggest reporting to either the US top brass, the UN or a cheese-eating-surrender-monkey and immediately take over command of the forces in Syria. I believe with your superior strategic mind the world will be safe once and for all. And don't worry about your Fantasy team, I'm sure it will take care of itself... (I did my best Breesus, it's up to you now)

Mission Accomplished

The Mission Accomplished Award recognises outstanding achievement in walking away early and not finishing it off

The Week 8 MA is awarded to Zim with 43 points on the bench in a losing team. 

The Week 9 MA is awarded to BB with 43 points on the bench in a losing team.

The Week 10 MA is awarded to BB with 42 points on the bench in a losing team.

Week 10 - wash-up

A day late again, but again I spent some time at home this week and was, obviously, far too busy playing Fallout 4 to write this up (I can confirm, Jebus is cleaning up the Wasteland just fine). Back at work today and with no access to Fallout 4 (*shakes*) I have ample time.

Week 10 was a big week in football: The Patriots and the Panthers stay unbeaten at 9-0, the Bengals drop their first game for 8-1, and the great Peyton Manning breaks the all time passing record, throws 4 interceptions and then gets benched. Will we ever see him throw another shaky pass? Post game, another coach was fired this week, one our favourites, Rob Ryan. He was the Saints defensive coach and after giving up something like 1 million points in the last three weeks heeeee's outta there! Good riddance, I would have fired him after last season. I had my Firin' Glove all polished and everything.

Big movements locally, too, of course. The General and Marcy are running together, BB drops a rung, Doof climbs a rung and the Lighties... let's see what happened there*:

*drop mic*

The General (119) def Endless (117)

A close one for the General who was so pleased with this win and the elevation to the top of the Standings he texted me Tuesday to gloat. That is one happy General! And why not - a five game winning streak, top perch, a team of classy players. Endless was so close, the pick-up of TE Rogers this week was a good one, Cooks had a stand-out game and if Gurley had continue his rampaging this would have been in the bag.

Marcy (100) def Farns (98)

Not even close to the projected 135, but Marcy did enough to keep Farns down and herself in equal first place, second in the Standings. Jeffrey and Eifert had miserable games but Brown loves having Big Ben at QB and posted a fine 28 points. Rogers came alive again in the 4th quarter for a good 22. The Farn's gambled it all on Marcus Mariota, the rookie QB, but caught him on a down week. A fair gamble with the primary QB on a Bye. AP was brilliant with 28 points, over 200 rushing yards on the day. AP is back and the Vikings have taken over their division, a game up on Green Bay. No one saw that coming.

Agent P (87) v Breesus (82)

Agent P is riding high on a 2-game winning streak while Breesus drops to a 5-5 record. MVP Candidate Cam Newton tops this game for Agent P, 21 points and a 9-0 record. Another middling team for Breesus, Brees had another downer, Bryant and his Cowboys look done for the season, rookie sensation Cooper was kept low by the Vikings. Barnidge is having a fine season as TE for the Browns, a good free-agent pick-up several weeks ago.

Zim (90) def BB (56)

Just how badly did Peyton Manning do? Minus 6.6 points. It didn't get much better for BB this week, the bright spot being the Gronk with 17. But 17 for Gronk means points for opposition QB Tom Brady, so it's one of those Fantasy Paradoxes: Cheer-Boo-Head Explode. Zim's Patriots had a good game, except poor Edelman who broke his foot and is out 6-8. The loss drops BB from equal first and now sits a game behind the leaders.

Doof (76) v Lighties (42)

Two big fat donuts and three more players under 2 points - I pocket the WIN and the Standings. You could make the case that a score of 76 is not worth bragging about - you know, if you're going to be petulant about it-  but screw that! Let's see it again - wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo:

*Thanks to the trolling Farnsworth's for this excellent work, you brought a big old smile to my face while a tear ran down my cheek. But I won't tell the Lighties Head Coach who trolled his desk, it's our secret *tap nose*.

Week 10 - Match-ups

Five games left of the regular season, it goes so quickly. Some of us will be playing the next five weeks for their play-off standing, and even whether they make it. For others of us that have been questioning our draft strategy for some weeks already, we'll be trying to throw the spanner into the works. That's right, a new award for 7-10 teams that take out 1-4 teams: The Spanner.

The General (105) v Endless (95)

The first big Spanner Challenge comes this week as Endless has a change to cut the stormin' General down to size. Her first act will be to replace the TE with Donnell and consider doing something drastic with Lacey. But, speaking from recent experience, the General's troops are just so nicely diversified, it is hard to pick against him.

Marcy (135) v Farns (110)

A buck thirty five projection? Jebus, Marcy is going all out this week to reclaim top spot and keep the pressure on Farns. With Ryan on the Bye the Farn's is rolling with rookie QB Mariota, who has shown some skill at times, but faces a huge challenge in Carolina. Fitz v Seahawks is tight too. Should be a good match-up this weekend.

Agent P (108) v Breesus (122)

Another coach that can throw Spanners this week, Agent P certainly has a squad capable of upsetting Breesus and keeping the pressure on him making the top 4. Newton, Martin, Bernard... pretty much all players have favourable looks this week. With Drew Brees anything can happen, Bryant is struggling with back-up QBs throwing to him and Cooper is playing a tough Vikings D. Interesting game.

BB (96) v Zim (89)

It's 1 v 10 and Zim and the projection is close as Zim has not updated her team yet. Lewis did his ACL last week and is done for the season. If God made people, and people made sport, God would've have given us better ACLs. Ergo, there is no God. There, that argument is now settled. There may well be something else in the universe, though, which is keeping Peyton Manning going, but the mojo is wearing thing. Or Tom Brady stole it, like some sort of Skeksis Quarterback, draining the essence from gameday footballs, occasionally deflating them by mistake.

Doof (97) v Lighties (106)

The classic match-up returns and I am certainly looking to correct the obvious referee errors from Week 1 when the Lighties were granted the W. Once again their dark magics have wielded a higher projection, but their sorcery is no match for good old fashioned villainy. On Tuesday the Red Rocket will ride this team to victory and beyond and we will sit high in our tower looking down on the world like ants and laugh ha haha hahahahahaha.