Week 4: Match-ups

A lot to look forward to in Week 4: starters scoring highly [please please please], Breesus King of the Drews seeking support from On High for the ass-whooping he receives from the Anti-Breesus-Inator [please please please], and the top-of-the-table clash against the rampaging Agent P and the glowing Illuminators.

Agent P (102) v Illuminators (111)

In her first full game the new coach of Agent P will open her account against the 3-0 Lighties. The smack-talk started early for this game, in typical Illuminator (read, arrogant German) fashion. The danger for our lovable Secret Agent, the Lighties have been backing up their smack by winning games. In good news for Agent P, the 102 projection includes two empty starting spots. A kicker and a defense will certainly take Agent P over the Illuminators' projection. Certainly the Game Of The Week.

Zim (97) v Farnsworths(127)

Farnsworth's have not started well at 0-3, meanwhile Zim's dropped last week to the Lighties. Zim is already waving the big sticks around at training, threatening blorch and other atrocities should they fail her again. Will the stick work? Should she be wielding a giant carrot? Farnsworth has the early projection lead, but I think the players are significantly over-valued.

Maidens (94) v Endless (98)

A close match-up between two 1-2 teams. The Maidens can close the projected gap by adding a Kicker to the team and swapping out a suspended player. Endless is suffering from the same symptoms as so many other teams, players arent performing and now have low expectations. Not much to be done about that except maybe offer some trades with other players or just cross your fingers and hope for the best. This is certainly the Second Best Game Of The Week.

Wooli (76) v US Forces (86)

The Forces suffered their first loss in Week 3, while Wooli has slipped a couple in a row. Wooli will need to update the QB position as his starter is on a Bye, while the Forces Tight End is having his bye. It just so happens that I have a spare tight end I am willing to trade for. Say, Jason Whitten for Jamaal Charles or Reggie Bush or DeSean Jackson? I can sweeten the pot by throwing in LaVeon Bell. All teams can hit me up if they want Whitten, I'm open to trades.

Doof (105) v Breesus (98)

Both teams are coming off their first win of the season and will be looking to consolidate in Week 4. A loss to either team will put them well behind the leaders and make the season quite difficult. In contrast to earlier reports coming out of Ingoldstadt, Doof was actually working with Agent P in putting together the Anti-Breesus-Inator. Occasionally an evil scientist and his secret agent nemesis can work together, when the greater good is at stake. In similar fashion, the Jerusalem Times is reporting that Breesus has been in negotiations with the fanatical Pharisees and simpering Sadducees, something about the proper use of taxes raised at market stalls being funneled into the local football program, which will [obviously] have positive returns on the local community. The Pharisees and Sadducees are excited about the prospects of the King of the Drews this week, and cloak and dagger stories about a secret wager of thirty pieces of silver should they lose are clearly unfounded.